HRH started in his ASD specific preschool on Monday. I was nervous about it, very nervous. I loved the feel of the preschool when I was there but transitioning is difficult for HRH and I knew there would be tears. The first day I made the mistake of looking back only to see him lying on the floor, trying to crawl out after me, sobbing 'Mama Mama' with his teacher holding onto his feet! (it's ok, you can laugh).
He has been very happy when I have collected him a few hours later so I knew the transition period would be short and indeed it was. This morning, 3 days in, he went in without tears (and I didn't look back). Despite the nerves, part of me was really looking forward to him going there, partly for his sake, partly so that I could have a bit of a rest and also that I could spend some quality time with Her Cuteness. She is 23 months old now. She was 7 months old when HRH was diagnosed and has spent the better part of her life being trucked around to appointments and working around HRHs' schedule.
I thought she would love having me to herself, really, I did! It never once dawned on me that she would be lonely for HRH #parentfail. She is so sad without him. She keeps asking for him and won't settle to any activity with me. At 12pm on the dot her uncanny body clock kicks in and she goes to stand by the window and whinges. We leave to collect HRH at 12.30pm and she whinges until we walk out the door. The pair of them as so happy to see each other at 1pm.
I know she will get used to it and after a while will be very happy to have me all to herself. But until then, well, there isn't really much I can do, is there?
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31 comments:
I am sooo delighted to read this story -how lucky your kids are to have each other !
Your littlest one sounds like a wonderful person
And you my dear are raising some lovely kids
What K-F said!
This happened with me and my two too. First, my daughter missed my son when he would go to school. Then we started homeschooling him while she went to a special needs pre-school, and he would miss her. (well, we both would)... :-)
It gets better. One foot in front of the other, right?
Oh that sounds soooo familiar!! Caleb was so happy to be at school (although recently he's been regressing and having tantrums once we get there). Grace wants to go to school with him. She thinks they're twins and should do everything together. It's the most adorable thing in the world to see your kids love each other. =)
My daughter is the same way about Casey. She spent most of last year being trucked around to Casey's appointments and to get hi from school. She cried when he got on the bus the other day, then started saying "Casey, where are you?" while looking out the window at various times. I thought that she would enjoy having time without her brother constantly badgerig her and taking things from her.
So glad that school is working out. Your kids sound so cute together. Maybe absence does make the heart grow fonder.
So lovely, Jen. It is a great achievement to settle HRH in playschool, your little one will adjust in time.
@KFloortime, he is just as excited to see her when he comes out of school, so cute :)
@LifethatAspergerbuilt, we were homeschooling him but herself used to sit outside the door crying to join in so we decided to send him to the preschool, it was hard for her then too!
@Ashley, awww, I know exactly how much they must miss each other, especially twins!
@Karen, she might yet, once she gets used to him not being around. I am counting on that!
@Mamafog, don't think it is absence, they are brilliant together at home which is why I can't believe I didn't think of her missing him!
@Brigid, I hope so lol, I want some quality time with her!
Thanks for commenting:)
Jen
So cute! My boys don't miss each other that much, but they do ask for each other while one is at school or while one is napping. It's more Xavier asking for Jaylen, since Jaylen is always happy to have me to himself. She will come around and be very happy to have you to herself. And I am glad to hear that HRH is transitioning well! That is great news Jen.
To me this sounds like an opportunity....
Is there some sort of toddler playgroup with other moms and kids or "mommy and me" class (art, dance, kids yoga?) that you can take her to one or two mornings a week?
Because at 2 years she is definitely ready to socialize and this just might be the perfect opportunity to start to develop her own social life with her own little friends (and you get to hang out with other moms, too).
If there's no group - start one! 4 or 5 moms with a 1&1/2 to 3 year old kid or two each, rotating between each others houses for 2 hours once a week should do the trick.
So glad it is going well after a few rough days. That is so sweet about your daughter too, what a bond they have. I fear the same when the Crazies start school, I can't wait for time with Sawyer but he won't know what to do with himself without them.
So glad that HRH is settling:) And it is lovely that Her Cuteness misses him, I'm sure she will settle soon as well and enjoy her mornings,especially when she realises that she can get to do special stuff with you xx
I'm so happy to hear that HRH is going to preschool and that he likes it! That's awesome for him and for you! Her cuteness is so sweet and loving that she misses her brother!!
The Gremlin gets this way when summer ends and The Professor goes back to school. He gets over it eventually.
It's great that HRH is starting to enjoy pre-school. Her Cuteness is such a pet XXX
This is hard bur still so sweet :) This bond between them is truly precious
I'm glad HRH is adjusting to the preschool so well! And it's sweet that her Cuteness misses him so. She, too, will adjust, hopefully soon so the two of you can really enjoy your time alone. :)
Awww...that is so cute. I guess the bright side is that you REALLY get time to yourself :)
@MTTB, she is having a tougher time than HRH with the whole 'change' thing :)
@Varda, there is a lovely little music and dance class for kids her age that I am going to bring her to, she will just love it.
@Jessica, Sawyer will be so lost without the crazies, I'd say they keep him well entertained!
@BlueSky, I hope you are right, just as well I am not sensitive lol.
Thanks for commenting:)
Jen
@TheHenrys, sweet and loving yes, a total whingebag too though :D
@Bella, yes, it must be hard after the long summer holidays.
@Borgerour & Kim, yep, thanks :D
@Lynn, true, better than hanging out of me I suppose lol
Thanks for commenting ladies :)
Jen
Just think, if he didn't go to school, you would not know this about both of them!
'Much to do' or not, I would use the opportunity for language and thinking development in Her Cuteness. Decide how you want to phrase "HRH is at school; you will go to school when you are older; HRH is older/ born before you...whatever you want her to learn and repeat it. (It's ok, you can call it a script.) Honestly, the repetition might help calm you, too. Change as needed or you choose.
That's how much I would choose to do. But like everyone else, I agree that she will adjust, too. Over the holidays our Teen complained about our CollegeSon being home. Yea, this might change several times over the future.;)
Barbara
Really pleased HRH has settled so well, it won't be long until your little girl gets use to the alone time, it will probably be the school holidays when she realises that she has to share you again x
That's wonderful...I was lucky to have alone time with each of mine-still do for a bit each day with my youngest..I love that they are thrilled to see each other.There is nothing like the bond siblings can have..I find it lovely-exasperating sometimes too! ;0
I am so glad that he has settled, and it is so lovely that the two of them are so close. What a lovely relationship they have xx
It is cute that Her Cutenesss misses her brother. I'm sure she will come to love having you to herself (and you will love it too.) I have to admit, I'm relieved to have a break when I send my kiddo off to school too.
Just think, you can go out for breakfast more easily! ;)
Awww, this was quite a sweet story. Sibs missing each other is something I wouldn't have thought of either (and I love your use of twitter hashtag here!).
Found you via the facebook link up--am now a google follower and facebook like-er! :)
Just goes to show what a fab Mum you are Jen. That Her Cuteness wants her big brother back with her. How beautiful that they are close. You must be proud. Mich x
You are such a strong woman and I admire that. You have so much going on emotionally and you always get through it so bravely! I think that you are right that her Cuteness will eventually love having you all to herself.
Oh, sad. We never think of that do we? Mr4 missed Mr7 terribly when he first went to school. Now he looks forward to his days at home with me. Lord knows why. Preschool is way more fun than I am!
So sweet that they miss each other :). Those transitions are hard, but they do get better as it becomes more routine.
Jen,
I hope it gets easier for Her Cuteness soon. It really is nice that she loves her big brother and misses him.
Aloha,
Sue
How great that you have a special preschool for HRH, what a great resource. I'm sure it will be wonderful for him, and for you and the little one too, it will just take a bit of adjusting. And wow, you have 30 comments on your post?! Awesome!!
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Lovely to hear from you.